The day I was diagnosed with endogenous depression was one of the best days of my life. I suddenly understood why I’d been feeling this way for so long and I knew there was a way for me to get better. And yet I was scared.

Endogenous depression – sometimes also called clinical depression – is a form of long-term depression that occurs when your brain chemistry is not doing its job properly. Unlike exogenous depression, which is often brought on by a specific reason (e.g., the loss of a loved one or setback in one’s career), endogenous depression often occurs when the individual suffering from it has no real reason to be affected. Obtaining a diagnosis for endogenous depression can be difficult, as often the person suffering from it will look for an external factor for their depression. Because of this, some people end up sabotaging aspects of their life long before they hit rock bottom and ask for help.

I was first diagnosed in the last year of my undergraduate studies. I was worried, my exams were in two weeks, and the information leaflet for the medication that I had been prescribed seemed to imply I wouldn’t be feeling well while my body got used to them. I had already dropped out of a university degree earlier because of my depression, and I was scared it would happen again.

This is where I got lucky: during my studies, I’d become rather close with the university administrator, so I reached out to her to discuss my worries about the medication. What happened next showed me how powerful it is to have good mental health allies. She sat with me while I explained my situation, and she shared how her sister had used anti-depressants to fight post-partum. She told me not to be scared and take care of myself, that she’d make sure the university understood.

Less than four hours later, I had an email from the dean, telling me my university would be more than happy to accommodate any needs I may have: from moving my exam date, to allowing me to retake any exam I wanted without penalty. I took the medicine, I took my exams, and I ended up graduating first of my year without needing any of the offered support!

Ever since, I have been a strong advocate for mental health education and allyship. I know that there are many ways my story could have ended differently. The university administrator could have had no knowledge of depression, the university might have not understood how to deal with my situation, I could have decided not to tell my school at all. Without allyship, I wouldn’t be where I am right now: happy, with a thriving career and surrounded by people I love.

For anyone currently wondering how they can include mental health allyship in their day-to-day, here are a couple of recommendations:

1. Look into your company’s current position on mental health. For example, Avanade has a Mental Health Allies Program AND a global wellbeing program that provide anything from basic introductions to mental health, to more in-depth initiatives like how to best support colleagues that might be showing signs of deteriorating mental health.
2. If you don’t have a dedicated team like we do at Avanade, I’d love to challenge you in starting your own! If that doesn’t seem achievable, start small by inviting a mental health champion (like myself) to come speak to your team and start a conversation around the topic. I’ve done this myself with some of the teams I have worked with in the past and it has led to great conversations on how we might be able to support each other more in our day to day. I highly recommend it, even as a team bonding activity!
3. It can be tough be the one people turn to when they are going through challenging times. You might find that you reached out to someone that looked like they were struggling and don’t really know what you should do. If that happens to you, don’t panic – there are many numbers available for you to call and get advice as an ally. In fact, many companies just like Avanade have partnerships with mental health hotlines, enabling you to find out how to support those who have reached out.
4. Keep in mind it’s easy to give too much of yourself when you’re trying to be there for other people. Make sure you don’t take it all upon yourself and find colleagues or friends that might be able to help you in your endeavours. Working with a group will help you shoulder some of the work when it might not be a good time for you.

To any of you that might be struggling right now:

I’ve personally been very privileged to have worked in businesses that take mental health very seriously. Avanade’s leadership does an incredible job at destigmatizing the taboo around mental health by addressing it without judgement during worldwide company calls and events. I would be remiss if I didn’t point out that seeing supportive leadership like this make it a lot easier for people like me to share their story.

I know it’s difficult to discuss something like this. In the first place, it’s scary to admit to yourself, but trust me learning more about a mental health condition will only make you feel more in control. You might also not feel like you can take the rejection of opening up to someone who doesn’t understand, or you might feel like the stigma is too great to do so – all these reasons very valid and you shouldn’t feel bad if you are not ready to open-up about your mental health state. Know however that an estimated 1 in 4 people will at some point deal with a mental health crisis.

You are not alone. Reach out to the people you trust, and they might surprise you with the support and love they give. 😊

Wishing everyone a great Mental Health Visibility Day!