Invitation in: My coming out journey

Article
Posted on June 21, 2024
Estimated read time: 3 minutes
Article by Fredrick Douglas Williams
Share

Pride Month is a time for celebration, and in my life, I have so much to celebrate. I have an incredible career as a UX designer and serve as the co-chair of Prism, Avanade's LGBTQ+ employee network. Through my inclusion and diversity work, I get to connect with people from all walks of life and build spaces where people are free to be their whole selves. I’ve even been recognized during Avanade’s Global Inclusion & Diversity Awards as an inclusive community builder.

But things haven’t always been easy. In the quiet corners of memory, where echoes of youth linger, I find the phrase: “I wish that you can see in yourself what others see in you.” And in those moments, I think about how the love and support of a friend helped me get to where I am today.

With reflection, my identity takes on a prism of new meaning, refracting across time. When I was younger, it held a different weight – a secret whispered by the adults in the room or my peers on the playground. People glimpsed my truth before I dared to name it.

Everything changed when I met my friend Jennifer. Our friendship commenced at age five in kindergarten and continues to this day. Jennifer always saw the real me, and when I was 14, this sparked a new notion in me. That was when she first saw my sexuality, painted in hues I hadn’t yet mixed on my palette.

And there it was – the recognition, the prism refracting anew, the colors I’d hidden, the hues I failed to mix. She said, “Fred, you’re gay!”

But Jennifer wasn’t accusing me; she was reaffirming me. Having been accustomed to perceiving acceptance through a negative lens, her approach was a true 'Ah Ha' moment. She invited me to step into a new garment – a woven fabric of confidence worn today between meetings, relationships and design deadlines. My garment became my shield, navigating the teenage years into adulthood.

Indeed, Jennifer's demonstration of positive acceptance was a revelation for me. It taught me the importance of accepting others, even when empathy and acceptance wasn’t always extended to me in return.

Jennifer, my first protector – the guardian of secrets beyond family walls. She cradled my truth, like a fragile treasure in her hands and close to her heart. It was her revelation that unlocked the doors I hadn’t known existed. She swung them open, and I stepped out into a new world.

And she listened, not with judgment but with understanding. Her eyes reflected the colors of my soul. She became my confidante, weaving a fabric of acceptance around me. In her recognition, I found strength. I saw Fred, a new and empowered version of myself.

In moments when strength wavers, I return to the foundations laid by Jennifer. Her unwavering support is an internal springboard – a source of resilience propelling me forward.

When I first realized I wanted to dedicate my life to helping others like me, I knew I wanted to make their journey as smooth as possible, sparing them from the challenges and emotions I've faced. I want to ensure that everyone I support feels seen, heard, loved and – most importantly – accepted. I see myself more as a caring father figure than just a role model, as I want to deeply nurture the inner child who still needs support in navigating this journey. I am honored to continue guiding others as a role model through my work with Prism.

That initial lesson in acceptance shaped my core, empowering me to navigate a world that doesn’t always understand. Jennifer’s impact runs deep. Accepting someone who fears judgment or mistreatment holds immense power—it creates a safe haven where authenticity can thrive. With Pride, Jennifer and I embody this truth woven into the fabric of our shared journey.

talk-to-expert-form

Subscribe to Avanade Insights

Doing what matters starts here

Tell us more about your challenge or need and we will connect you to the right Avanade expert to help you.

How can we help?

Press Contacts

The Americas

TA-PR@avanade.com

Europe and Middle East (EME)

EME-PR@avanade.com

Asia Pacific (APAC)

APAC-PR@avanade.com

Headquarters

North America
Global Headquarters
1191 Second Avenue
Suite 100
Seattle, WA 98101
Europe

30 Fenchurch Street

London

EC3M 3BD

Growth Markets
Singapore Headquarters
Avanade Asia Pte Ltd
250 North Bridge Road
#30-03 Raffles City Tower
Singapore 179101